I breezed through the second trimester laughing in the face of insomnia, piles and acne. I was so smug with my power pregnancy that I even got married at six months pregnant, jumping around to House of Pain until 1am.
And then came the fall. The third, rotten, sleep-evading trimester from hell. Leg cramps wake me up with a start six times a night and in between that, I’m in and out of the loo up to four times a night. Then there’s my complete inability to find a comfortable position to sleep in. I bought a Dreamgenii pillow – basically a man-shaped feather cushion – which helps me stay on my right side, but going on for six times a night, I wake up having rolled onto my left side and received a jab in the ribs from the baby who isn’t keen on diverting from the recommended norm.
So when I was offered the chance to road test a massage that promised to (1hr 15 minutes) ease tension and boost relaxation, I waddled as fast as I could to the Mayfair-based Elemis spa.
The last thing I can do or want to do is to lie on my back or front, but an enormous beanbag solves that. It’s not a little unlike the Dreamgenii cushion, just three times the size. You lie on your side propped up by towels and cushions that your therapist artfully arranges around you. Then your spine, legs, arms, hands and head are massaged using the gorgeous Elemis’ Japanese Camellia Body Oil Blend, which claims to hydrate dry skin, improve elasticity and help guard against stretch marks. It also smells like actual heaven. Next, Elemis’ Instant Refreshing Gel is applied to your feet to reduce swelling – so very needed when the weight of a predicted 10lb (I know) baby is pressing down on your legs. Finally, there’s a mini facial using Elemis’s Cellular Recover Serum and Pro-Collagen Marine Cream.
The therapist, thankfully, doesn’t go near your bump and approaches you with all the care of midwife handling a newborn. I slept that night for the first time in months. If only I could have one a day til B Day.
Prices from £95. For more details visit elemis.com